If I recover from being a shut-in, it will be thanks to that old Minneapolis stand-by Eli's. It's a classic, though it doesn't any longer feature the charms of Angie. You gotta love a surley pregnant girl who takes your order by pulling up a bar stool and moaning, "Christ, what's it you guys want now?" then carrying back a tray of beer balanced on her belly, and presumably on the head of the kid-to-be. That oughtta be a requisite pub feature.
Now, having ventured out to Philly last week, the "grass-is-always-greener" phenomenon struck me. I realise that the best crowd in Philly were displaced
from the old "Northstar Bar" after its closing. Most of them were in attendance at this fabulous wedding I'd been
invited to. So I got to see them assembled like a reunion of the displaced. I was shocked to find that they had scattered to new locations rather than moving en masse to another bar. Right? The closing of both the old Northstar on Popular and China Rice House on Walnut Schtreet means I'll be forced to find new haunts in that city - well, other than my hauntiest: Bonner's.
Going to Bonner's was really just like sitiing in the extra living room I always wanted, only with more beer.
So my suggestion is that Minneapolis bar owners "get their hand off it" already and open a real joint with a horseshoe bar. Then hire a real staff who'll pour my drink before I sit down, insult me, and offer some gossip about shenanigans from
the last night's attempt to close on time.
Oh and a couple of retiree cops who come in at 1:00am with fresh hot pretzels in a paper bag would be nice, too.
UPDATE: A couple weeks ago, I stopped in to
The Bulldog and before I sat myself down on the stool, there was a Jameson with beer chaser on the bar.
Who knew?
I felt like Sally m.f. Fields: "They like me! They really like me!"
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